Schemas refer to mental concepts and patterns that help organise the relationships between categories of information. Schema Therapy helps by first recognising the client’s negative schemas and coping styles, before working towards changing them and forming healthier beliefs and behaviours. In Schema Therapy for Couples (ST-C), this approach is used in the context of relationships to help you manage your dissatisfactions in the relationship.

ST-C is Effective in Managing:

Indirect and overt conflicts
Lack of emotional connection
Trust issues
Unsatisfying physical intimacy
Poor and negative communication
Lack of shared interests, values, and goals
Personality and mood disorders
Abusive relationships

Schema Therapy applies the concept of early maladaptive schemas, or negative schemas developed in childhood. These schemas typically develop from traumatic childhood experiences. The schemas affect our perceptions and hence our behaviour, especially during ambiguous situations. They thus drive the formation of unhealthy coping strategies which may become dysfunctional when affecting attachments, relationships, or day-to-day activities.

Can I Go for ST-C Alone?

ST-C is valuable regardless of whether you come alone or with your partner, so long as you comply with the teachings of the therapy. Either way, you will learn to address your individual maladaptive schemas and develop your own sense of direction and determination to fulfill your own unmet needs. This does not require your partner’s agreement or consent. At the same time, you will develop greater self-awareness and better coping methods to improve your relationship.

ST-C Approach:

Intake: You and your partner will be assessed based on your interactions and identification of problems and strengths.
Assessment phase: Your therapist will conduct interviews and inventories to conceptualise your relationship dissatisfactions, while identifying maladaptive behaviours and thinking patterns.
Analysis: Your therapists will select the qualities to develop and focus on and devise a customised “road-map” of the treatment plan. Frequency and duration of the treatment process will be discussed before proceeding.
Treatment: Behavioural experiments, role-playing and education will be conducted to achieve goals discussed.

Techniques Used in ST-C:

Guided Imagery: You will be asked to form images of upsetting childhood memories to identify the associations that have developed between past experiences and current triggers
Limited Reparenting: Your therapist will provide guidance and validation to fulfills the unmet needs you have
Empathic Confrontation: Identification of maladaptive thoughts and behavioural patterns
Role-playing: Rehearsal of learned adaptive behaviours and coping strategies

Everyone Deserves To Blossom

Nunc tincidunt egestas velit nec efficitur. Duis vestibulum volutpat nibh sed consequat. Maecenas tincidunt, arcu vel iaculis cursus.

Book a Session

Chat on whatsApp

Gentle Start-Up in Couples Communication

What is a Gentle Start-up?

Effective communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship, and this holds for couples as well. A gentle start-up in communication refers to initiating a conversation with care, empathy, and respect. It’s about setting a positive tone for the discussion, which is essential in ensuring both partners feel heard and understood.

In Asian households, where communication can sometimes be perceived as harsh or direct, the concept of a “gentle start-up” may seem jarring, and unfamiliar. Traditional Asian households often prioritize directness and sometimes even bluntness in communication, leading to misunderstandings and conflicts within couples.

In fact, gentle start-up is actually aligned when the values of Asian households. Many Asian households emphasize respect towards loved ones. In such contexts, starting a conversation gently can be seen as a sign of respect, even if the content of the conversation is a complaint.

Maintaining harmony is a fundamental value within Asian households as well. A gentle start-up not only reflects respect but also serves to preserve the equilibrium within the relationship. Initiating a conversation gently reinforces the importance of the relationship. This approach communicates that the relationship is more significant than any temporary disagreement or frustration.

In Asian households, collectivism and interdependence are deeply rooted cultural values. These values emphasize the interconnectedness of the couple and the idea that their actions and words can impact the entire relationship.

The gentle start-up approach aligns with these values and aims to minimize the emotional impact of difficult moments within the family. By choosing a more respectful and considerate tone, family members can navigate challenging conversations with minimal emotional harm, ultimately promoting healthier and more harmonious family dynamics.

Benefits of Gentle Start-Ups:

Enhanced Understanding:
- Initiating a conversation gently allows both partners to approach the topic with an open mind, fostering better understanding and empathy.
Reduced Defensiveness:
- A harsh start to a conversation can trigger defensiveness, making it challenging to resolve issues. A gentle start-up can minimize this defensiveness, leading to more productive discussions.
Conflict Resolution:
- By using a gentle approach, couples can create a safe space for addressing concerns and resolving conflicts constructively.

In Asian households, the importance of gentle start-ups in couples’ communication becomes evident when considering the cultural dynamics at play. While directness and bluntness have their place, employing a gentle approach can foster understanding, reduce defensiveness, and facilitate healthy conflict resolution. It’s a harmonious blend of traditional values and effective communication techniques that can lead to stronger, more resilient relationships in the context of diverse Asian households.

Schema-Based Couples Therapy

Can I Go for ST-C Alone?

ST-C Approach:

Techniques Used in ST-C:

Everyone Deserves To Blossom

Tags:

Previous Blog

Next Blog

Gentle Start-Up in Couples Communication

What is a Gentle Start-up?

Benefits of Gentle Start-Ups:

Schema-Based Couples Therapy

Can I Go for ST-C Alone?

ST-C Approach:

Techniques Used in ST-C:

Everyone Deserves To Blossom

Tags:

Social Share:

Previous Blog

Next Blog